Ouch!!! It terribly pains.
The above statement of expression is not from a fall, but comes from the misunderstanding of relationship between two people.
Relationship- that one word around which the whole world revolves.
What is Relationship?
The dictionary gives the following definition for Relationship: Relationship is a connection between people, being related by blood, dealings or kinship.
Relationship exists with parents, siblings, spouse, children, relatives, friends, colleagues and even with the outside world.
Relationship with parents and siblings is by blood. Relationship with spouse comes from marriage. Relationship with friends comes from bonding. Relationship with colleagues is through dealings and acquaintance.
There can be no individual in the world who can claim that he/she has or has had no relations. Relationships are the primary essence of one’s existence.
Relationship and the Solar System:
In a book written by Mahatria Ra comprising of 11 series and in one of the series, which deals with Relationships, he has given an analogy where the individual and his/her relationships are compared to the Sun and the planets respectively.
Mahatria Ra says that the individual and the relationships are like the Solar System. The bondage and time that you invest in a Relationship, will determine the status of the Relationship.
The greater the time and bondage closer is the Relationship. The lesser the investment of time, the farther is the Relationship from you.
It is just like the Solar System. The closer Relationships are like the planets Venus, Earth and Mars which are closer to the Sun. The Relationships that which have distanced themselves from you are the Saturn, Uranus and Neptune.
The longer it takes to build a Relationship; it shall always withstand the tests of time. Relationship should be nurtured like the Banyan tree, which lives for centuries.
Relationships in the modern society have undergone dramatic changes over the years. Many relationships do not function the way people intended them to be. These changes have been positive changes and not so positive changes.
Lack of compatibility, communication, tolerance, patience and time are some of the factors that affect a good relationship.
There are instances, where the parents feel alienated from their children as they grow old. This is because, as parents grow old, the son/ daughter lack the tolerance and the patience, to take care of their ageing parents. This affects the relation between the parents and the children.
Compatibility is one issue, which affects the relationship between the husband and wife of the younger generation.
Misunderstandings topple the bonding between friends.
Expectations from Relationship:
In this life, we come across many people with whom we maintain relationships. Some relationships give us happiness and some give us pain. The degree of happiness or pain that we experience from a relationship can be attributed to the degree of expectation from that relationship. For instance, parents expecting too much from their children and being unrealistic in their expectations.
Marriages turning sour, is one of the most common issues in this modern age where having spent one year or a good twenty five years together does not make any difference, when quarrels begin and the relationship begins to see tough times ahead, because of unrealistic expectations set by both the partners.
Unrealistic expectations sabotage a relationship. How many times have we been hurt because we assumed that the other person understood our expectations? It is important that in a relationship both the individuals take responsibility for the relationship to survive.
Apart from the lack of compatibility, tolerance and patience which can upset any relationship, effective communication is very important for any relationship to succeed.
Communication and Relationship:
Communication is critical for any relationship. The key to a healthy relationship is to keep communication in flow. It plays a very important role, in the exchange between people. Lack of communication, can cramp the relationship and hinder its growth. Only communication will help to exchange our opinions, feelings and disagreements to the other person. A good communication can resolve all problems, be it at home or at the workplace. There is nothing like a good chat at the end of the day.
Listening and being heard is very important for communication. Listen to the other person’s views and opinions. Give a lending ear. Never be inconsiderate to what the other person has to say. Present your views and justifications.
As somebody said,” For a Relationship to thrive we need to talk to each other instead of about each other.”
Forgiveness and Relationship:
Forgiveness is an important element, for any relationship to grow and cherish. Forgiveness is not something that you are doing, for the benefit of the relationship but, for your own benefit. It means that you truly value the relationship. The man who seeks forgiveness is human, but the man who forgives is God!!!
Remember, Relationships are built on trust, faith, and love. To sustain any relationship, one has to face many trials and tribulations in life. There is no relationship, devoid of misunderstandings, but at the end of the day, to gain something one has to lose something in life. To cherish a wonderful relationship, man has to forego his ego and recall, the hundred special moments that the relationship has given him and not think, about the few disturbing moments.
In short RELATIONSHIP as somebody quoted is: “In Relationship being faithful is never an option but a priority. Loyalty is everything.”
Here are some tips to maintain and enjoy a healthy Relationship:
1. Value the Relationship. Never make the mistake of taking the Relationship for granted.
2. Have realistic expectations from the Relationship.
3. Learn to forgive and forget. Nobody is perfect. Relationships are more important than giving undue importance to trivial mistakes and issues.
4. Learn from your mistakes which threatened your Relationship. Don’t repeat them.
5. Relationships are built on trust and faith. Never break them.
6. Spend quality time with your near and dear ones. Sometimes it is necessary to prioritize your Relationships over work.
7. Make it a point to call up loved ones to let them know that you still remember them in spite of the everyday busy life. Let them know that you are there for them.
8. There is nothing like connecting with a long lost friend.
9. Meeting up often with friends and relatives help in strengthening the bond.
10. Last but not the least, Relationships are like seeds. The more you water them with love and care, the stronger they grow into huge trees. You reap what you sow
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